Lulu Prose, The Saga Continues…
It’s not so much of a saga these days as much as a moderately comedic, moderately dark, melodrama where all the characters have little to no interaction with the main character for most of the tale except the ones that she makes up in her head.
Fluoxetine has not blocked my weirdness or my creativity.
Flouxetine has also not blocked my ability to procrastinate very, very, effing well.
Technically, this post is coming right on time. However, I have been half-working on slash not at all working on a very machine gun, almost rap, type poem. I just might be forcin it like I’ve got something to prove. I forget that I don’t! Reality checked. I decided to focus on this post instead.
This week fluoxetine chilled out a lot. I still could recognize the filter, but I stopped being SUPER happy. I am thinking that without it, I would have had to fake being happy as I usually do but this week I was disgruntled to a mild degree a couple times. I didn’t lose total control most of the time but I went far enough where I was like, damn, that was a waste of time and emotion. The thing is: people prey on my heart, gullibility, and silly demeanor like I’m Bambi. Don’t get me wrong, I love deer jerky. But some people just go too far. For some reason they need to try and push my buttons. It makes them feel powerful. This week, I only fell for it maybe twice! The big one was a kid a work that insisted I should buy a sweater instead of piling on my BOHOBOmian chique jackets and scarves. I ended it by asking him if he lived with his parents. Ope. Properly emasculated. He will never look at me the same way again (which is okay because he was weirdly flirting with me a couple of times and he is probably 14 years younger than me)
Also, I cried. It made my head feel painful. Like I felt like it took my brain all its power to force water to come out of my eyes. It wasn’t a lot. But it was well placed. It made sense and gave me hope that if something truly tragic happens, I won’t walk around like Elsa in the early years. BTW I have this whole philosophy on her fame and her theme song and the people who like it incorrectly, but that’s another post.
I’m having a game night this Saturday, so it’s almost gauruteed that I will have something more interesting to discuss. I only hang around heady kats. I mean, it’s a game night. I’m on the hunt for http://cardsagainsthumanity.com/ so it could be pretty Fruedian.